The following piece on "common sense" was sent to me by a reader of this site. I found it both humorous and all too real for comfort. I checked the dictionary and to find that common sense was "ordinary good sense or sound practical judgment." Here is the witty but all too true article.
My parents told me about Mr. Common Sense early in my life, and told me I would do well to call on him when making decisions. It seems he was always around in my early years, but less and less as time passed by, until today I read his obituary. Please join me in a moment of silence in remembrance. For Common Sense had served us all so well for so many generations.
Obituary
Common Sense
Today we mourn the passing of a beloved old friend, Common Sense, who has been with us for many years. No one knows for sure how old he was since his birth records were long ago lost in bureaucratic red tape.
He will be remembered as having cultivated such valuable lessons as knowing when to come in out of the rain, why the early bird gets the worm, life isn't always fair, and maybe it was my fault.
Common Sense lived by simple, sound financial policies (don't spend more than you earn) and reliable parenting strategies (adults, not children are in charge).
His health began to deteriorate rapidly when well intentions but overbearing regulations were set in place. Reports of a six-year-old boy charged with sexual harassment for kissing a class mate; teens suspended from school for using mouthwash after lunch; and a teacher fired for reprimanding an unruly student, only worsened his condition.
Common Sense lost ground when parents attacked teachers for doing the job they themselves failed to do in disciplining their unruly children. It declined even further when schools were required to get parental consent to administer Aspirin, sun lotion or a sticky plaster to a student; but could not inform the parents when a student became pregnant and wanted to have an abortion.
Common Sense lost the will to live as the Ten Commandments became contraband; churches became businesses; and criminals received better treatment than their victims. Common Sense took a beating when you couldn't defend yourself from a burglar in your own home and the burglar can sue you for assault.
Common Sense finally gave up the will to live, after a woman failed to realize that a steaming cup of coffee was hot. She spilled a little in her lap, and was promptly awarded a huge settlement.
Common Sense was preceded in death by his parents, Truth and Trust; his wife, Discretion; his daughter, Responsibility; and his son, Reason.
He is survived by three stepbrothers; I Know My Rights, Someone Else is to Blame, and I'm a Victim.
Anonymous
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Your post is very hilarious. “Criminals received better treatments than their victims” reminds me of O J Simpson when he got out of the guilty verdict on his wife’s murder. But recently he was convicted of his crime by a jury in Las Vegas. Thank God that Common Sense is not completely dead.
Ha! Ha!
This is so funny, but sadly true.
Why would anyone think this is funny? I read it as tragically true. Perhaps we should wonder whether God has given us up.
Hi there. If you’d like to see the original piece (it gets pirated and “adapted” a lot) go to http://loriborgman.blogspot.com/2005/07/death-of-common-sense.html