Some readers of this blog, and my closest friends, are well aware that I have struggled for nine years with a mysterious ailment that is often misdiagnosed and routinely misunderstood by the wider public. Almost everyone I know feels tired, sometimes extremely tired. It is the nature of living in the modern world, or so it seems. If you lead a busy life and you are over fifty you sometimes feel very tired. But being tired and having Chronic Fatigue Immune Dysfunction Syndrome (CFIDS) are simply not the same thing. There are times that I wish we had a different (better) name for this illness since so few people understand me when I try to explain the life I try to live in coping daily with CFIDS. Yesterday’s edition of The New York Times had a wonderful article on CFIDS. I share the link to that article so that all who pray for me can understand better what you are praying for as you remember me before God’s throne of mercy. I also share this because many of you who read this either have this illness (maybe you even need a proper diagnosis and this might help you get it) or you know someone very well who has CFIDS. I can tell you that the better you understand CFIDS the better you can cope with it. By understanding it you can also become a helper to those who suffer daily with this strange viral condition.
I assure you that I am not soliciting sympathy by this blog. I am soliciting prayer. If I do not always respond to emails and posts that you make on this site as frequently as you might hope please remember that I am quite often struggling to keep up with all that I handle every day. What God has done in me through this is by grace alone. But I still long to be whole. Someday, one way or the other, I will be, in his own time. That I am sure of and rest in while in this mortal flesh I struggle day-in and day-out with a strange illness with no cure and little explanation.
I can still confess the goodness of God and the mystery of divine providence. I know this is his doing and thus it is, in spite of the negative impact of the illness, ultimately good.